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Friday, February 16, 2018

The End of My 30 Day Yoga with Adriene Journey #YWATRUE



The end is really the beginning. As I sit here today, still rocking my now-baggy leggings and my somewhat loose-fitting tank top, I am overcome with a lot of emotion. I will tell you about days 21-29 first and get into today's practice at the end.

Day 21 Finesse: I sit taller, walk better and find myself choosing to move over sitting still. I dance around the house more. I take the dog on a walk. I am choosing activity over remaining sedentary. I haven't chosen that in a long time. I have lost over 20 pounds at this point and over 12 inches overall on my body. Today's practice was a welcomed nice and easy one today!
Day 22 Release: Adriene always knows what to say because its always what I need to hear. Gosh I adore her!
Day 23 Balance: Hard balancing poses. They are fun but very challenging. My whole body shakes. Guess I got to shake it to wake it, eh?
Day 24 Be Kind: Lots of stretching and meditation. What a breath of fresh air. 
Day 25 Be Awake: Abs-oh my! Walk the plank, Arrrrggh!
Day 26 Be Still: The lizard pose was very difficult but I did it!! I am left wondering if I will be able to walk tomorrow?!!
Day 27 Be Free: My whole body is sore but I answered my question; yes I am able to walk today!
Day 28 Be Fearless: I am still so sore. Lots of legs today. I feel good
Day 29 Be Brave: What a day of self-love. It sure is amazing. I am really proud of myself.

Day 30 BE YOU: I only just finished my last day of this TRUE yoga journey so I knew I needed to sit down and get it all out. I was excited to don my clothes and hit the mat today. What I was expecting was not at all what I received. As she always does, Adriene welcomes you to the mat and sets your intention for the day's session. She is emotional, as am I as I start to cry a little. I cried because I DID IT! I decided to do something for me and I committed to it. Was it easy? No. Was it worth it? Hell yes! Then Adriene says she is going to turn off her mic and we were going to do our own thing. What? Wait a minute here! Well, Adriene always tells us to trust her so trust I did.

I am not going to lie to you but today was the sweatiest and my least favorite day of all. My mind wandered everywhere {for the first time in these past 30 days} and I just didn't feel connected to myself. Did I have a great workout? Yes. Did I feel like a lost soul? YES! I discovered that I am not ready to be left to my own devices yet. I found myself looking up at the giant 65" TV inches from my face too often and I was not able to close my eyes. Why? Well because I didn't want to remain standing in Mountain pose with my eyes closed in anjali mudra while Adriene was in Cobra. 

I wanted to hear her crack a funny joke. I wanted her to remind me to listen to my breath. I wanted to hear her go through the poses so I could relax and know what to expect in mere seconds. I just didn't feel as though I was ready to be kicked out of the nest yet. I did my absolute best to stay true to myself {no pun intended but that was good!} and move in a way that was authentic to me while following my friend through the poses. I sweat like crazy and, at the end, for the first time in a month I very much missed my new best friend tell me that she loves me and send me off on the day with a "Namasté". 

Once we bowed and I whispered "thank you, Adriene with much love. Namasté" I looked up and the screen was black and I read her final words. I started sobbing uncontrollably. I cried and cried-a big ugly cry. I cried for my commitment to myself. I cried for believing I could and then doing it. I cried because now I can plank/extension easier that I could at day 18. I cried because I see myself differently now. I am now capable of far more than I was a month ago and for that I am forever grateful. I am so overwhelmingly grateful for the spirit that led me to Adriene and I am most thankful and grateful for her Charisma. She believed in me when perhaps I didn't and together we grew in many ways. I jump out of bed in the morning looking forward to seeing my friend and hearing her lead me on a journey back to myself.

Adriene, you are one amazing goddess and I am incredibly thankful for all of the hard work that you put into your videos. You have absolutely changed my life for the better and I cannot wait to continue this journey with you. I love your sense of humor, your charm, your cute smile, Benji, oh Benji and I love fixing my gaze at your window locks. I am not sure why they are what I always pick, but it works. Thank you for coming to me at a time when I needed you most. Thank you for inspiring me to keep on keeping on and for making me want to continue showing up. You make me want to be a better person and that is something money cannot buy. 

When I came to start this journey I said "I took the first, albeit small, mental step to doing something positive for ME!" I had no idea at the time that what I thought was a small step ending up being a catapult straight to self-love, joy and a fulfilled heart.

What now? Don't worry, my BFF and I will be continuing right along with Love Yo'Self for February! Stay with me and tell me all about what you do to stay true to yourself. If you recently started doing YWA or with anyone else, I want to hear about it, too! Leave me a comment or send me an email.

NAMASTÉ

2 comments:

Krystal Moralee said...

Well, love, you inspired me to give it a try. I did a beginner one over the weekend and another today. I don't think I'll be able to do it every day but I plan to do it when I can. Today, merely sitting up straight and breathing was a challenge, turning my neck was painful, I am unable to clasp my hands behind my back, and my ass is way up in the air during child's pose. I'm looking forward to all of that getting easier, and my body feeling better. Adriene seems great and down to earth. Thanks for the inspiration. Love you, friend!

Jacki said...

You are amazing, my friend! Thank you for sharing your journey.